I'm Back

Fireworks and Sharks is back and better than ever! That is absolutely not true. Not at all. It is back, but probably not better. Probably more of the same. Now that I am no longer a Hobo Drifter, I will regain my position of postmaster of the F&S blog. My original true love.

Not much is going on in the Moffatron's world these days. I am currently living in the land where Kevin Bacon and Gary Coleman rein supreme (Payson, UT). I'm playing video games, cruising the interwebs, and watching So You Think You Can Dance. It's nice... Reeaal nice. Oh and occasionally I'll drink a Mt. Dew. As you can see, my life is filled with activities right now, so I have a lot to blog about. That means regular posts. So stay tuned, there's going to be some exciting stuff coming up. Even more exciting than the 90210 season finally...

Oh and if you were wondering, yes, I recently had a mustache. It was the most beautiful thing I have ever brought into this life. May this video of me dancing with a mustache bring you joy this holiday season.

Hobo Drifters.

Hey everyone. And by everyone I mean the handful of people who read this, I have started a new blog with a bunch of friends who I am currently traveling with. I'll be updating that one now for a while so check it out and follow if you want. We are hobo drifters now.
hobodrifters.blogspot.com

Adventures With the Z.

I've realized that most of the adventures I've had this summer have been with this kid....

And he's got a sweet shark tat.

Legendary or The Normal Dude?

Ever since I saw a guy get stabbed in the throat, there has been kind of an ongoing joke around the work place about me. Have you ever heard any Chuck Norris Jokes? Like Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird... yeah those are like the jokes that have been going around, except they are directed at me, "Jason Moffat The Legend once stitched a guy up in the middle of the road with only a blade of grass." They've even said things like, "Jason Moffat The Legend ran Mt. Marathon in twenty minutes, and took an 18 minute lunch break on top." And the list goes on. That's the stuff I've been dealing with. Flattering, yet annoying, I've been dubbed The Legend.

Changing subjects...

This summer I've grown a pretty awesome beard, if I do say so myself. I've really enjoyed not having to shave every day and I think it's made me look a lot more like a grizzly Alaskan. Tourist just eat that stuff up. But it's just about that time to think about shaving. All good beards must come to an end... Actually I take it back. That's a horrible motto. Beards should never have to end. I'm planning on doing some awesome man-scaping (which is a given, but I still don't know what I'll carve). I am scared what people will think of me without the beard. When Josh cut his mullet, people hated him for it. Hate is a strong word, probably just didn't respect him anymore. Some people up here only know me by my adorable grizzly bearded self. Now I'll just be Jason Moffat the Normal dude. Which is fine I guess.

I was actually really surprised to find out that there are plenty of other beard and moustache enthusiasts around the world, just like me. This clip is from the World Beard and Moustache competition that was held in Anchorage this summer.... yeah, I was there. One of the proudest moments in my life.

If any of you are interested in improving your facial hair, I ran upon a book that might help. The Facial Hair Handbook, written by Jack Passion, world champion beard grower.

http://jackpassion.com/

“ Jack Passion is to the sport of bearding what Tiger Woods is to the sport of golf.

— Phil Olsen, Founder and Self-Appointed Captain, Beard Team USA

Well that's my feelings on beards. Next time, I'll tell you what I think about Moustaches.

Calvin Klein

Recently I have been seeing these flyers around work that say something to the effect of, "Employee photo contest: $200 dollar prize for the photo that best captures the beauty and allure of Alaska." The other day I walked into the drivers lounge and see two random close up photos of me rafting on the Kenai river, hanging on the wall. I can't even really remember where these photos came from, but written above them says, "The Legend. Beauty and Allure," with the photo contest flyer attached to it. I myself found it pretty funny, so you can imagine what others thought. So I got to thinking, ya know those were pretty good pics, but I think I've got a better one. And boy did I have a gem. Knowing the person that put the photos up, I didn't feel bad when I posted this one of him up.

Needless to say the photo didn't stay up for long. But the best part was to see all of drivers reactions when I nonchalantly rolled into the lounge and posted the sexy photo. People were rolling on the ground.

The classic Jason

So I've pulled the classic Jason move... Procrastination! or just flat-out forgetting. My blogging skills are not (yet) near the bonumus maximus status as ol' A-town, but I'll try harder. As for now, may this picture hold you over till next time.

Stabbing and what-not...

So it's been a while done the whole blog thing, but I had some weird stuff happen to me this last week. Because I really don't want to type the whole thing up again, I'm going to cut and paste the story I explained to a friend just recently. Here it goes...

10:21pmJason
Dang man It's a long story
10:22pmGavin
I love long stories
10:24pmJason
Do you really want to know?
10:25pmGavin
Yes
10:27pmJason
Well I was driving a bus down from denali all by myself. It's about a four hour drive. I stopped to get something to eat and when I was leaving I heard someone say "get back here you chicken sh* mother f*er!"
10:27pmGavin
Haha
I'm liking this already
10:29pmJason
So I see one chubby guy chasing another and I just laughed because I thought it was funny.
10:30pmJason
Well there was a scuffle and the one guy ran away holding his neck and into a cabin-like building while the other guy stayed behind.
10:31pmGavin
Go on
10:31pmJason
At this point I was like "what the freak is going on?"
I hear a lady screaming and decided to stick around in case the lady was like getting raped
10:31pmGavin
Good call
10:33pmGavin
And...?
10:33pmJason
The lady runs across to the store part and I see the guy poke his head out of the building all bloody and crap
So at this point I was trying to get the guy to come over to me and hide behind my bus
10:34pmGavin
The bloody guy, right?
10:34pmJason
Yeah dude don't rush me
10:35pmGavin
Haha
Sorry
10:35pmJason
I'm trying to get the story right
10:36pmJason
But I was also trying to be inconspicuous because I didn't want the maniac killer to see me
So I was Yelling really quitely "dude! Dude! come over here"
He yells "that guy just stabbed me in the neck!"
I yell softly "come over here"
He yells "he's still out there!"
So I see the guy as I was going to the store part and booked it as fast as I can
and I yell in the store "call and ambulance or something, some guy just got stabbed"
10:40pmJason
I ran back to my bus to grab some paper towels or something
Gave it to the guy and he put pressure on it. The EMT's came right after.
Right when They came the guy took off the towel and then it sinks in as I see a freaking whole in the guys neck!!!!
10:42pmGavin
Wow
10:47pmJason
The funny thing is when the police were getting my statement they asked if he said anything to the other guy. "I remember the guy saying specifically 'get back here you chicken sh* mother f*!'" And the police dude wrote that down in quotes
10:47pmGavin
Haha
Awesome
I'm hoping you did an impression of it as well
10:47pmJason
kind of

Land of the Midnight sun.

So I finally arrived in Anchorage on monday. It has been pretty weird being back, almost like I never left. The weather has been good, which is weird. Last summer it seemed to rain every day. We got ourselves a pretty sweet apartment close to the bus yard, which is nice because only one of us has a car. Although Josh, Seth and I are looking into buying a sweet van we found online for 500 bones. And it looks pretty dang awesome. Other than that we haven't been doing much except going to meetings, remembering how to drive a bus, and playing..... MORTAL KOMBAT! Fun game, but Josh kills us. 

Our tour company merged with another one, so it's kind of been like starting over again with a different company, which has it's good points and it's bad. So far it seems like it's going to be a pretty good summer. But who knows. 

Kind of boring right now, I'm sure it won't be like that for long. 

Well it's time for a blog...

Alright, I guess it's time that I gave in. Time to give way to the movement they call blogging. I never really thought I would start a blog, but it seems to be all the rage these days right? So that means I am obligated by society to do it... Okay, that might not be the case. Actually, those of you that care about what I am doing or care what goes on in my head (that's a scary thought), can jump into cyberspace and find out. I'm heading out to Alaska tomorrow to drive tour buses for the summer again. I'm pretty excited to go back.  So I figured this is a good opportunity to share my experiences and keep people updated. Anyhoo, I have to go finish packing and then give Josh a mullet (he asked me, because of my superior hair-cutting skills, especially in that of mullet and mohawk making). Stay tuned, there will be more updates soon. As for now... Uhh... I need a signature sign-out... I'll think of one. 

Jason